The Hotel and Wife!

Next time you think your hotel bill is too high, you might want to consider this:

My wife and I are traveling by car from Victoria to Prince George . After almost eleven hours on the road, we were too tired to continue, and

decide to take a room, but we only planned to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road.
When we checked out four hours later, the desk clerk hands us a bill for $350.00.

I explode and demand to know why the charge is so high. I tell the clerk although it's a nice hotel; the rooms certainly aren't worth $350.00.
Then the clerk tells me that $350.00 is the 'standard rate'. I insisted on speaking to the Manager.

The Manager appears, listens to me, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for us to use.
"But we didn't use them." 
"Well, they are here, and you could have," explains the Manager.

He goes on to explain we could also have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous.
"We have the best entertainers from New York, Hollywood, and Las Vegas perform here," the Manager says.
"But we didn't go to any of those shows."
"Well, we have them, and you could have," the Manager replies.

No matter what amenity the Manager mentions, I reply, "But we didn't use it!".

The Manager is unmoved, and eventually I gave up and agreed to pay.  I write a check and give it to the Manager.

The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check.
"But sir, this check is only made out for $50.00."
"That's correct, as I charged you $300.00 for sleeping with my wife."

"But I didn't!' exclaims the Manager.

"Well, too bad, she was here, and you could have."

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How to Tell the Sex of a Fly

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her
husband stalking around with a fly swatter.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"Hunting Flies?" he responded.

"Oh. ! Killing any?" she asked.

"Yep, 3 males and 2 females," he replied.

Intrigued, she asked "How can you tell them apart?"

He responded, "3 were on a beer can and

 

2 were on the phone."

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Reverse ATM PIN?

The recent tragedy of a young woman being kidnapped and eventually killed, after she had repeatedly given the kidnapper a wrong pin to her ATM card.
If she knew the method below, she could have been saved. So I think it is important that you should remember this working method.
If you should ever be forced by a robber to withdraw money from an ATM machine, you can notify the police by entering your PIN # in reverse. For example, if your PIN number is (1234) then you would put in (4321).
The ATM recognizes that your pin number is backwards from the ATM Card you placed in the machine. The machine will still give you the money you requested, but unknown to  the robber, the police will be immediately dispatched to help you.
This information was recently broadcasted on FOX TV and it states that it is seldom used because people do not know it exists.
PLEASE PASS THIS ALONG.

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Free Google Service

Google has done it again...  pass it on!
Not everybody has On Star, etc. or a phone book handy.
Look what Google is doing....

Here is something you will want to have and use!

This is a number worth putting in your cell phone, or your home phone speed dial:
1-800-goog411  (1.800.466.4411). 

This is an awesome service from Google, and it's free -- great when you are driving on the road with no pen, pencil or paper handy. Don't waste your money on information calls and don't waste your time manually dialing the number.
I am driving along in my car and I need to call the golf course and I don't know the number. I hit the speed dial for information that I have programmed.

The voice at the other end says, "City &State." I say, "Garland , Texas ." Then the voice says, "Business, Name or Type of Service." I say, "Garland Golf Course." He says, "Connecting" and  Garland Golf Course answers the phone.
How great is that? This is nationwide and it is absolutely free!

Click on the link below and watch the short clip for a quick demonstration.
http://www.google.com/goog411/

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Car’s alarm

What to take to bed with you - not a joke.
Pretty neat idea!
You might never think of it before!
Put your car keys beside your bed at night.

Assuming that you  have a vehicle that has a remote controlled alarm system, tell your spouse, your children, your neighbors, your parents, the Dr's office, the check-out girl at the market, every-one you run across. Put your car keys beside your bed at night.

If you hear a noise outside your home or someone trying to get in your house, just press the panic button for your car. The alarm will be set off, and the horn will continue to sound until either you turn it off, or the car battery dies. 
This tip came from a neighborhood watch coordinator.
Next time you come home at night and start to put your keys away, think of this:

It's a security alarm system that you probably already have and requires no installation. Test it. It will go off from most everywhere inside your house and will keep honking until your battery runs down or until you reset it with the button on the key fob chain.

It works if you park in your driveway or garage. If your car alarm goes off when someone is trying to break into your house, odds are the burglar, or rapist won't stick around. After a few seconds... all the neighbors will be looking out their windows to see who is out there... and sure enough the criminal won't want that.
And remember to carry your keys while walking to your car in a parking lot. The alarm can work the same way there. This is something that should really be shared with everyone. Perhaps it could save a life or a sexual abuse crime.
It would also be useful for any emergency, such as a heart attack, where you can't reach a phone.
I have suggested to my friend that he should carry his car keys with him in case he falls outside, and his wife doesn't hear him... He can activate the car alarm and then she will know there's a problem.

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Watch out for the following area code

We actually received a call last week from the 809 area code. The woman said 'Hey, this is Karen. Sorry I missed you, get back to us quickly, I have something important to tell you.' Then she repeated a phone number beginning with 809.

Do Not dial area code 809, 284, and 876.

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT INFORMATION PROVIDED TO US BY AT&T.
DON'T EVER DIAL AREA CODE 809.

This one is being distributed all over the US ...
This is pretty scary, especially given the way they try to get you to call.

Be sure you read this and pass it on.

They get you to call by telling you that it is information about a family member who has been ill or to tell you someone has been arrested, died, or to let you know you have won a wonderful prize, etc..
In each case, you are told to call the 809 number right away. Since there are so many new area codes these days, people unknowingly return these calls.

If you call from the U.S. , you will apparently be charged $2425 per-minute. Y

ou will get a long recorded message…
The point is, they will try to keep you on the phone as long as possible to increase the charges.
WHY IT WORKS:

The 809 area code is located in the Caribbean Islands...
The charges afterward can become a real nightmare because you did actually make the call.  
If you complain, both your local phone company and your long distance carrier will not want to get involved and will most likely tell you that they are simply providing the billing for the foreign company. You will end up dealing with a foreign company that argues they have done nothing wrong.

Please refer this message  to your friends, family and colleagues to help them become aware of this scam.

AT&T VERIFIES IT'S TRUE.

SNOPES VERIFIES IT'S TRUE:

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Simple Miracle drug.

Top doctors discovered combination of garlic, vinegar and honey give us a dose of magic
medicine we can cure for every diseases from
cancer to arthritis. Many notable studies in renowned universities in the world have proved the simple and cheap drugs are superior ways
to treat almost any affliction. Experts have verified that the three garlic - vinegar-honey could "wipe out" all common diseases and rare diseases.
The patient was successfully treated include Alzheimer's, arthritis, high blood pressure, some type of cancers, high cholesterol, colds, flu, flatulence, digestive problems, headaches, heart disease, hemorrhoids, infertility and erectile impotence, toothache, obesity, ulcers and many many other diseases.
In a study of arthritis, doctor Angus Peters of the University of Edinburgh has found that regular daily drink vinegar mixed with honey will reduce the pain up to 90 percent.
According to Dr. Raymond Fish of the Center for Obesity Research Center (London) taken  a dose of garlic and vinegar every day can help destroying the fat and reduce the excess weight very fast.
The Lancet Medical Journal of England reported that the average cholesterol level decreased from 231.4 to 224.4 after volunteers eat 50 grams of garlic and four ounces of butter. This has proved harmful effects of high fat foods may be mediated by adding garlic to the diet.
A study of 261 adult patients conducted by Germany Association of General practitioners indicated that the factors on the level of cholesterol and triglycerides in the serum, are associated with the risk of heart disease, decrease significantly if more garlic regularly adding to your daily meals.
Studies in Housing's MD Anderson Cancer Institute in Houston, University Pennsylvania State University and GCLA have the previous evidence that a substance in garlic inhibits the causes of breast cancer, colon, esophagus and skin. National Cancer Institute Center (NCI) discovered in a study on 1,000 people are eating more garlic to reduce risk of stomach cancer. Professor Etik Block of the University State University of New York, Albany, stated garlic released at least 100 compounds to produce sulfur, all with high potential for medicine.
No doubt the magical medicine of garlic, vinegar and honey can extend our life and giving us the ability to protect our body against many causes from all agents of killing disease. 
Dr. Jack Soltanoff, dietitian at New York, praised the benefits of apple cider vinegar apple vinegar. He said "All three materials are very effective and available everywhere, if use everyday it costs just a few pennies and I do not understand why people do not use them more widely." He has recorded several good results  from some of his patients with arthritis. He said "I have seen many arthritis patients taking the remedy felt comfortable immediately. Only a few weeks in most patients with arthritis were able to do the normal operation" 
Honey is described as a perfect food, containing at least 31 nutrients, 13 minerals, the composition of nine vitamins, six acids and four main enzymes  keys. Patients are taking daily mixed vinegar and honey looks more robust, never had a cold and infectious disease, and they are generally healthier than others. So this magic medicine may be prolonged by protecting us against the sickness is no longer an issue in dispute.
Honey not only makes the medicine more palatable because of its sweetness, but also helps the body absorb the medicinal properties of these 3 wonderful materials. Garlic was a stockpile of vitamins and minerals, but what the scientists most excited is the substance in garlic has allicin (an oily substance), an enzyme (amino acid) has a stimulating effect the immune system.
How to prepare doses of garlic, vinegar and honey:
In a bowl mix a cup of apple vinegar, a cup of honey and eight chopped bulbs of garlic. Put all into the blender and then blending with high speed for 60 seconds. Pour mixture into a covered jar and refrigerate for at least 5 days.
Normal dose is 2 teaspoon mixed in a glass of fruit juice (orange or grape juice is best) taken before breakfast. You can take another dose in the evening.

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Have you ever heard printer’s mouse?

Caller:	Hi, our printer is not working.
Customer Service:	What is wrong with it?
Caller:	Mouse is jammed.
Customer Service:	Mouse? Printers don't have a mouse you fool!
Caller:	Mmmmm??.. Oh really?... I will send you a picture.

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Serious Phenylpropanolamine drug are recalled.

CONFIRMED BY: SNOPES.COM & FDA  Jan 5, 2010
All drugs containing PHENYLPROPANOLAMINE are being recalled.

STOP TAKING anything containing this ingredient. It has been linked to increased hemorrhagic stroke (bleeding in brain)
Among women ages 18-49 in the three days after starting use of medication The FDA recommended that everyone (even children) seek alternative medicine.
The following medications contain Phenylpropanolamine:
Acutrim Diet Gum Appetite Suppressant
Acutrim Plus Dietary Supplements
Acutrim Maximum Strength Appetite Control
Alka-Seltzer Plus Children's Cold Medicine Effervescent
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold medicine (cherry or orange)
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine Original
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold & Cough Medicine Effervescent
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold & Flu Medicine
Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold & Sinus Effervescent
Alka-Seltzer Plus Night-Time Cold Medicine
BC Allergy Sinus Cold Powder
BC Sinus Cold Powder
Comtrex Flu Therapy & Fever Relief
Day & Night Contac 12-Hour Cold Capsules
Contac 12 Hour Caplets
Coricidin D Cold, Flu & Sinus
Dexatrim Caffeine Free
Dexatrim Extended Duration
Dexatrim Gelcaps
Dexatrim Vitamin C/Caffeine Free
Dimetapp Cold & Allergy Chewable Tablets
Dimetapp Cold & Cough Liqui-Gels
Dimetapp DM Cold & Cough Elixir
Dimetapp Elixir
Dimetapp 4 Hour Liquid Gels
Dimetapp 4 Hour Tablets
Dimetapp 12 Hour Extendtabs Tablets
Naldecon DX Pediatric Drops
Permathene Mega-16
Robitussin CF
Tavist-D 12 Hour Relief of Sinus & Nasal Congestion
Triaminic DM Cough Relief
Triaminic Expectorant Chest & Head
Triaminic Syrup Cold & Allergy
Triaminic Triaminicol Cold & Cough
I just found out and called the 800# on the container for Triaminic and they informed me that they are voluntarily recalling the following medicines because of a certain ingredient that is causing strokes and seizures in children
Orange3D Cold &Allergy Cherry (Pink)
3D Cold &Cough Berry                    
3D Cough Relief Yellow 3D Expectorant
They are asking you to call them at   800-548-3708  800-548-3708    800-548-3708  800-548-3708 with the lot number on the box so they can send you postage for you to send it back to them, and they will also issue you a refund. If you know of anyone else with small children,
PLEASE PASS THIS ON.. THIS IS SERIOUS STUFF!
To confirm these findings please take time to check the following: http://www.fda. gov/cder/ drug/infopage/ ppa/

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New Mercedes Benz SCL-600

Are you too old to DRIVE this Car?

No joking! It is scary, but… true?

Presenting the New Mercedes Benz SCL600

Pretty, isn't it?

Not this scary!

Here is the real difference…

WHOA!

No Steering Wheel -

No Pedals either

You drive this car with a joystick!

Do you think that you

can control the car with a joystick?

Your kids and grandkids can.

The influence of video games in our lives

has really arrived, don’t you think?

But there is more!

NOW a very young kid can steer this car better than us! 

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Drinking water at the right time.

Did you know drinking water at the correct time maximizes its effectiveness on the human body?

• 2 glasses of water after waking up -  helps activate internal organs.
• 1 glass of water  30 minutes before a meal - helps digestion.
  
• 1 glass of water before taking a bath - helps lower blood pressure.
  
• 1 glass of water before going to bed - avoids stroke or heart attack.

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Coffee Filter and Its Great Usages

Coffee filters

You can buy 1,000 at any of  the 1 Dollar Store for almost nothing even the large ones. 

1. Cover bowls or dishes when cooking in the microwave. Coffee filters make excellent covers. 
2. Clean windows, mirrors, and chrome... Coffee filters are lint-free so they'll leave your windows sparkling.
3. Protect porcelain by separating your good dishes with a coffee filter between each dish.
4. Filter broken cork from wine. If you break the cork when opening a wine bottle, filter the wine through a coffee filter.
5. Protect a cast-iron skillet. Place a coffee filter in the skillet to absorb moisture and prevent rust.
6. Apply shoe polish. Ball up a lint-free coffee filter.
7. Recycle frying oil. After frying,  strain oil through a sieve lined with a coffee filter.
8. Weigh chopped foods. Place chopped ingredients in a coffee filter on a kitchen scale. 
9. Hold tacos. Coffee filters make convenient wrappers for messy foods. 
10. Stop the soil from leaking out of a plant pot. Line a plant pot with a coffee filter to prevent the soil from going through the drainage holes. 
11.. Prevent a Popsicle from dripping. Poke one or two holes as needed in a coffee filter. 
12. Do you think we used expensive strips to wax eyebrows? Use strips of coffee filters.. 
13. Put a few in a plate and put your fried bacon, French fries, chicken fingers, etc on them. It soaks out all the grease. 
14. Keep in the bathroom. They make great "razor nick fixers." 
15. As a sewing backing. Use a filter as an easy-to-tear backing for embroidering or appliquéing soft fabrics. 
16. Put baking soda into a coffee filter and insert into shoes or a closet to absorb or prevent odors. 
17. Use them to strain soup stock and to tie fresh herbs in to put in soups and stews. 
18. Use a coffee filter to prevent spilling when you add fluids to your car. 
19. Use them as a spoon rest while cooking and clean up small counter spills. 
20.. Can use to hold dry ingredients when baking or when cutting a piece of fruit or veggies.. Saves on having extra bowls to wash. 
21. Use them to wrap Christmas ornaments for storage.
22. Use them to remove fingernail polish when out of cotton balls. 
23. Use them to sprout seeds.. Simply dampen the coffee filter, place seeds inside, fold it and place it into a plastic baggie until they sprout. 
24. Use coffee filters as blotting paper for pressed flowers. Place the flowers between two coffee filters and put the coffee filters in phone book.. 
25. Use as a disposable "snack bowl" for popcorn, chips, etc. 

OH YEAH THEY ARE GREAT TO USE IN YOUR COFFEE MAKERS

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Got a style!

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How a patient get institutionalized?

During “The Bathtub Test” from

a visit to the mental asylum, I asked the director “how do
you determine whether or not a patient should be institutionalized?”.

"Well," said the director, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub". 

"Oh, I understand now," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it's  bigger than the spoon or the teacup".

"No." said the director, "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"

ARE YOU GOING TO PASS THIS ON, OR DO YOU WANT THE BED NEXT TO MINE ???

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How is your house being seen?

Your House As Seen By:
Yourself...


Your Buyer...


Your Lender...



Your Appraiser...

And...
Your County's Tax Assessor...

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World Champion Woman Driver Awards

2009 Woman Driver Awards:

10th place winner goes to

and… 9th place goes to

We have the winner for 8th place

and the 7th place grant to

Proudly present to you our 6th place driver for this contest year

and… our 5th place winner for this year

and here comes our 4th place winner

our 3rd place winner will be

present to you now, our special 2nd place winner

Look at her helmet carefully. The helmet has been worn backward.

our GOLD METAL winner will be granted to the woman champion driver of the year

WOW  ! ! How the...?!? 
Oh never mind.... CONGRATULATIONS ! ! 
This concludes the 2009 Women Drivers Awards Ceremony. 
Thanks to all of our contestants for giving us all a reason to laugh & smile.

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